I was having a breakthrough week of training before everything came to a grinding halt. My legs were racking up the miles, but my speed and pace did not reflect the fatigue I was feeling. Instead, they were setting PRs like crazy. One defining moment during this training block was at a MS150 prep ride near Round Top. I had already done hills during the week, but I wanted to tackle more. I was going at a relatively easy but working pace and struggling up a hill when a friend of mine blew by, yelling "C'mon, Angie. Get up the hill." My competitive juices flowed, and I sprinted after him. I was working pretty hard just to draft behind him, but I didn't mind because that's what I came out here to do -- to put myself to work and see what I'm capable of as a climber.
I stayed behind him for a good while before a pack of 10 men passed us. Judging by their speed, I was hoping my friend wouldn't hop onto their train because it would've made my ride that much harder. Lucky for me, he did. Here we go. Just hang on. Only 60 miles left..
I was dying. Or so I thought I was. Then for some reason, during one of the steeper climbs, I worked my way to the front, spinning relatively easy. Seeing that they might get chicked up a climb, the guys pushed a little harder. I just increased my cadence and within a few feet, blew by all of them. With a slight smile, Mr. Aloe Blacc's words played through my head:
Go ahead and tell everybody
I'm the man, I'm the man, I'm the man
Yes I am, yes I am, yes I am
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| Awesome workout or pump-up song :) |
I have arrived. The athlete that had been missing since the summer is back and with a vengeance. The athlete with a dream who showed up at each workout with a do or die mentality, ready to hurt. Push and hang with the big dogs or get dropped and play with the puppies. I had been playing with puppies for the last six months and was seriously doubting if I was still worth my dream. Not anymore. The engine is roaring, and I'm fit to go mentally, emotionally, and physically.
The guys caught me on the descent and kept the efforts high for a while, but by mile 20, all of them got dropped but one. :) Yeah, I'm back! And I'm ready to hurt!
My mentality carried into the Walburg Road Race as I never gave up on the pursuit of the leaders despite harsh conditions and tired legs. That road race is by far my defining moment of this year and showed me just how much I still have left in a depleted tank and what I'm capable of. I finished the race feeling as if I were three rungs higher on my dream ladder. You are capable of so much more. Don't ever think otherwise. Just keep on trucking.
Pace Bend Road Race
I toed the line of the Pace Bend Road Race the following day, ready to lay everything down on the course. I had nothing to lose and everything to gain in terms of fitness and fun. Recovery week started the next day, so I didn't need to save anything for later workouts. I started off in the front, doing way more work than I wanted to, but I did not want to lose sight of the leaders in case they made a move. My legs were definitely feeling the efforts from Walburg, but the flatter parts of the course allowed me to ride with higher cadence to help them recover. During lap one, I'd fall towards the back of the pack during the climbs because my legs were pretty toast, and I also didn't want to work up the hills too much as I needed to save them for later when the attacks come.
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| Someone was really excited for this race and wanted to wake up on time! |
Lap two, my legs began to warm up, and I was able to hang near the front during the climbs. I was feeling more and more comfortable with the course and knew where the opportune spots for attacks and breakaways were. By lap three, I was rearing to go. I'd be in the lead during the climbs and have to partially shut it down to save every possible muscle fiber for the upcoming moves and fall back into the pack. I saw two of the leaders talking and knew that they were going to attack sometime soon. I moved a little closer to the front and kept a close eye on them. We came around a sharp right turn into a descent, and we all accelerated to speeds over 30mph. Then mayhem broke loose. One girl bumped into another, and a domino effect occurred. Five of us went down, including me. I couldn't avoid it as swerving to the right would've taken a lot more of the peleton out and going left would've taken me into another rider, off the road, and into a guard rail. Once the person in front of me went down, I knew I was going to go down too, just didn't know how hard.
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| The aftermath: 5 bodies strewn down the road |
My right hip slammed onto the asphalt and my head quickly followed as I continued to slide a bit down the hill. After a moment of shock, I tried to get up to finish the race, but upon seeing enough stars to make a galaxy, I decided to put my head back down and wait for the medic. I said a quick prayer for me and the other racers, then proceeded to do a systems check. Everything was moving and had feeling, so I was happy about that. The headaches started getting worse, and I kept wanting to fall asleep every second. I stayed down until someone helped lift me and my bike up. I could barely unclip my right foot as my hip and knee were in so much pain. They got me to my feet but within moments I was feeling more woozy and unstable, so I immediately sat back down and held my head with my hands.
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| Rough day at the office: road rash on right knee, arm and hand; badly bruised hip; and concussion. |
The EMT finally arrived and after hearing my symptoms, he immediately stabilized my head and neck with his hands and asked for a c-spine. He checked and examined my head, neck, and spine and cleared me after asking some random daily questions. I was allowed to move, and just at the right time too as my friend Pamela biked by heading towards the finish. I was able to give her a thumbs up and cheer her on. :) After getting transported to the medical tent and getting cleaned up, I was in better spirits. Moving around helped my hip from getting stiff, but the headaches and sleepiness never let up. I did everything in my power to stay awake the rest of the day, especially on the drive home from Austin. Pamela was kind enough to caravan with me to ensure I got home safely. :) What an awesome friend!
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| One of three cracks in my helmet :( |
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| Something's not right with my front tire.. |
Sunday evening was one of the most painful evenings of my life! It definitely comes close to post shoulder surgery pain. But through my agony, I felt so loved by the outpouring of care and concern from my friends. My roommate helped clean and bandage my wounds, while Kat and Tao went around town trying to find Tegaderm bandages for me. Kat even spent the night, waking me up every 3 hours to make sure I could be awakened (what a trooper!). As Monday progressed, I was feeling worse with headaches, sleepiness, and nausea. I started getting really concerned as I had never felt this bad after a concussion before, so to the ER we went.
Waiting rooms suck, but it was all worth it since I got the good news that there was no bleeding in my brain and my CT head scan came back clear. It helped calm my heart and mind that the headaches weren't something more serious. I got cleared to resume training once I feel better. Yay!
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| Didn't think I'd have one of these ID tags on again so soon, but.. CT head scan was clear! I'm free to resume training once I feel better. :) |
I am still getting headaches three weeks later, but they aren't so bad, and they force me to get more sleep, so that's good. Silver linings, right? :) Throughout this ordeal, I've learned a few things:
- Apparently you can never count me out of a race unless I am taken out (please don't!). I will keep fighting until I cross the finish line because the race isn't over until it's over. Anything can happen before the white line.
- I need to learn to doubt myself less and instead trust in my abilities. Fear can hinder me from performing at my highest level.
- Learn to love and thrive through pain. Knowing that you've exhausted all reserves to finish a race is the best feeling in the world because you gave it absolutely everything.
- I have some of the best friends in the world. You guys are all freaking awesome and your love and support continue to motivate me to keep training and inspiring. :) I cannot iterate this enough: I am nothing without you and cannot complete this journey without your constant support and encouragement. I am beyond blessed to be able to take each and every one of you along with me for this amazing ride.
- During my down/recovery time, I got to spend more time with my new coach. We did some lactate and VO2 testing and had a lengthy discussion about the goals and plans for my future. There's LOTS to tell and share, but that's for another post! And as a spoiler to not leave you totally hanging, my dreams are not so out of this world and they may be coming true soon! :D
